28 things I would say to my younger self ...

Last August I turned 28 and this anniversary made me reflect on how much I've changed and how many things have happened into my life in the last 10 years, since I was an 18 years old girl just starting to discover the world.

Life truly has a lot of creativity and plans for us we cannot even imagine !

I definitely don't have any regrets and I would do everything again in the same exact way because it has lead me to the wonderful life I'm living now, but If I could go back in time and have a conversation with the little girl I was, I would tell her that :

[01] Your intuition is right, always. 

So I know you like to be a good girl and listen carefully to what other people say it's best for you, and sometimes you let your monkey mind take the lead telling you what you should be doing, but your intuition know yourself better than anybody else, trust that voice.

[2] No one really knows what's going on.

You have the impression that "adults" have it all figured out and they claim their beliefs like they're set in stone, but they're not. They're simply their beliefs, what was transmitted to them by their parents and the result of their own experiences, just that. You can think differently, you are allowed to have a different opinion.

[3] Teaching and sharing is not a waste of time. 

You think that the job of a teacher is boring and badly paid and that you would never do anything like that, but be careful , you'll actually become one, just a different kind , and it will be pretty cool!

[4] You are beautiful as you are.

There is no need to try to conform to anyone else. You'll discover that your curly hair and pale skin and all the things you complain about both physically and related to your personality are pretty awesome if you simply own them.

[5] Stop waiting for permission to do things your way.

The approval you're waiting for will not arrive from the outside, no matter how much you crave everybody to understand you and validate it, but only from you. And then you'll see F R E E D O M opening up in your life.

 [6] You worry far too much what everybody else thinks about you ( and see previous point!) 

 But you'll discover that most people are completely focused into their own lives and you're just a reflection of their stuff, so spread your wings freely.

[8] You'll still be messy and distracted by tiny details

and burning your food at 28, some things do not change but they will gradually improve ;-)

[9] Your parents are just people

with their vulnerabilities and insecurities, they're not super heroes. And that's ok!

[10] Get your suitcases ready

because you'll live far from your hometown and abroad for the next 10 years and it's gonna be the most amazing ride ( maybe just figure out your moving methods a bit more because carrying huge suitcases on the underground is not the best way ...)

[11] Talk about the things you're worried about.

They are not weird and you're not the only person in the world having these problems. One day you'll be called to share your voice and intimacy even more, thanks social media and this blog !

[12] Asking for help doesn't make you a weak person. 

You cannot and do not have to do it all by yourself. You're always supported by a tribe of people so acknowledge them and give them the gift of being there for you when you need it. This is an always evolving lesson for you!

 [13] Please stop cumulating so much stuff

You have enough clothes, and books and souvenirs. You'll totally value experiences more with time, and discover that having less stuff makes you so much more free and present. Ok you'll still have a weakness for beautiful books but something called "kindle" will help !

[14] Your ability to listen to people and hold a safe space for them will come handy in few years.

Being a great listener, holding a safe space for others and giving them presence is one of the greatest gifts you'll share with the world. 

[15] Your natural passions are not random. 

The fact that you write a journal every day since you're able to write is not a coincidence, it's your way of making sense of the world and a very precious one. What comes easily to you is cool and not random. 

[16] For a while you will keep on say yes to things you don't wanna do....

just to please people or because you think it's the right think for a few more years, sorry! But you'll learn that sometimes it's ok to quit mid-way and even better to listen to your inner voice that it's clearly whispering "no way"!

[17] Being good at something vs. loving something

You will soon understand the difference between being good and "competent" at something and actually doing something that L I G H T S  you up.

[18] Being modest doesn't mean you cannot share your thoughts with confidence.


[19] I know you feel lonely and misunderstood some days...

 but you'll be surrounded by the best tribe of friends , when you will start to show your authentic self to the world.
 

[20] No man is an island.

It seems sometimes but we're all connected to one another. Like they say in Yoga , the light in me sees the light in you and when we acknowledge each other's lights, we're one. 

[21] Moving your body is cool and needed. 

You'll learn to move your body in ways that feel good and even make a job out of it, I know crazy !

[22] You're totally lovable. 

This is probably the biggest lesson of all. Your path to romantic love will be rocky but you'll learn so many things along the way and just know one thing, you are totally lovable ! It comes from the acceptance and respect and the love Y O U give to yourself first. And maybe one day you'll write a book about it ( not yet happened don't worry !)


[24] The desire to spend time by yourself is totally ok.

It's called being an introvert. And you don't have to force yourself to be open and outgoing all the time to fit in. "Me time" will bring so much insight and magic into your life, so embrace it.


[25] You'll speak french!

in few years and live in Paris. Please don't ask me why or how.


[26] Have more fun! 

Don't take life so seriously. You've always felt a big responsibility towards your family, your studies and doing the "right" thing for society, but there isn't a right thing, only a continuous experimentation. Laugh more about yourself and about the quirky things of the world , don't take the weight of the world on your shoulders.


[27] Fail fast and fail often. 

Don't be afraid of making mistakes, it just holds you back from growing. You're a brave girl so put yourself out there, only good can come from being H U M A N !

[28] Believe you deserve to thrive.

This is still an undergoing lesson at 28, you think that you're a lucky girl and sharing all the beauty in your life will offend others that don't have the same. But that's BS , trust me ! You don't have to dime your light out of fear making others feel uncomfortable. Instead shine your light, as bright as you can and you will inspire others to shine their own lights. 



 

Alessia Gandolfo